Update: Thyroid!

I wish this post was going to be about my success on the detox and my triumph over weight gain and hunger, but its not. I gained this week and I am miserable, because of the detox. Although I can't blame only the detox my thyroid is being a complete P.I.T.A. I am so over the treatment and wish they would clear me to have it removed. I am already in a position to be on meds for the rest of my life.

Quick run through: 3 years ago I was diagnosed with Hypothyroidism after years of wondering why my body didn't work and a blood clot scare. I was put on Synthroid a synthetic thyroid (T4) replacement. After a few months of fiddling with the dosage I am now at .88mg and have been for a over a year. I get my levels checked regularly (3-4months) and everything (on paper) always 'looks good', 'is normal'. I have been calling my doctors bluff for about 6 months now as I struggle to lose weight, I find myself always cold and my moods uncontrollable amidst a dozen other thyroid (apparent) related symptoms. In October of last year (2011) my goitre returned and I underwent a barrage of tests including, chest scan (?), ultrasound and blood work. Again, my level came back at a normal range for both T4 and T3 (thyroid chemicals... I honestly can't think of the right word) BUT my ultrasound showed an enlarged thyroid and the diagnosis was Thyroiditis. I did an eye-roll and asked what that meant. The basic explanation was a viral infection that is attacking my thyroid and causing it to defend itself, by puffing up in size. It was explained to me that this is (could be) an Auto-Immune disease.

I met with a (useless) specialist who told me I was fine (I told him he was an idiot). I met with my GP who said just to ride it out and let it correct itself, but to keep an eye on it. And I met with a Naturopath who showed concern and wanted to rectify the problem before it got worse. She started me on drops (10 days ago) that are combined to force blood through the thyroid and flush it out. She told me this would fix it (hopefully) and even ease some of the symptoms I was still experiencing. After 5 days of drops my thyroid swelled to twice the size and was affecting my breathing and swallowing, plus it was pushing on my throat... which always makes me gag. Wednesday was a crummy day. She (my naturopath) told me to stop taking the drops for 3 days and start up again at a lower dosage. After 3 days (to yesterday) my thyroid was still swollen... I called her up again and she told me not to start the drops again until my thyroid was under control and if the swelling persisted through Monday to have another ultrasound done. 

In the meantime... on a restricted diet I have gained weight, my skin is a mess and, not to get to personal but, my nipples are SO itchy. I don't know if that is related, but it feels like it could be.

Never too much information... that's what I always say. I also did think about doodling a nipple, but thought that would be tacky. Sorry.

Its Friday. I should be thrilled to hit the weekend and strike another week off of my wedding countdown, but honestly I like the structure of work. I know when to eat, drink and exercise. We'll see how the weekend goes. There is no part of me that wants to continue this detox, but I made a commitment and I am going to stick to it.

Wish me luck!

Love!

UPDATE: I have a NEW endocrinologist (thyroid and metabolism specialist). I just spoke with my GP and I have a new referral; I picked the Doctor this time and I chose a woman based in Toronto. She is the top ranked endocrinologist in Toronto and I can't wait to work with her. As always I will keep you posted. I don't suspect my appointment will be in the next few weeks, but at least things are happening.

Pounds to Lose: 21

On a positive note (which should be a separate blog, but I am feeling lazy) last night was Thursday treat time! Every Thursday, detox or not, I get a treat. Typically I hunker down with a piece of milk chocolate, but since I can't have that during detox Richard took me to KindFoods in Burlington, an all Vegan Cafe/Bakery.

We decided on 'World Peace Cookies with vegan butter cream (I don't get it either). They're gluten-free, diary-free and nut-free. There are no chemicals either. I don't know how they hold it together or how they taste so DAMN good!

They were yummy, but we both had sugar highs. Yes, Richard and I shared them...

shame on you for thinking I ate ALL four.

STRESS!

You know stress is the cause of most ailments (I am going to make up a number right here) 87% of disease is brought on my unnecessary stress. In fact, I believe there is no necessary stress. People would argue (another random number) 13% of people (mostly family) argue with me (about this and everything else these days).

Case in point... Stress can bring a dormant illness, such as Hypothyroidism, to the surface (I didn't even make that up). This explains why the first 25 years of my life I was healthy (not happy, but healthy) and the last 4 years have been nothing, but one ailment after another, because the stress of my current relationship is killing me. To quickly add my fiance is amazing, he is my soulmate and the best thing that ever happen to me. I love him more than I ever thought I could love anyone and despite my health I have never been happier. The stress is NOT directly brought on by him... he is in fact an only child (see where I am going with this). He has very loving parents that insist on being a part of EVERY aspect of our lives to the point of smothering. Throw a wedding into the wood works and its a lost cause. It gives me a headache just thinking of the next thing that we aren't 'following tradition' on.

And I won't drag him down so I often take the brunt as their perfect son never behaved like this before... this is mainly because he never had a reason to.

It is so completely selfish... all of this paired with my Dad's deteriorating health, my health misfortunes, the wedding, the holidays and the on going struggle with my former best friend; I am out of patience for it all and find myself stressed (and eating) most of the time.

ARGH!

Phewf... that went somewhere on its own... Oops.

On the fitness front, because I always try to take it back to that... I tried to get down to the gym for a run today. I needed the stress relieve and I got down there (after a long personal pep talk) and half naked I realized I did not bring clothes with me... duh. So I got dressed up again and came back upstairs to write this blog.

Love!

Mondays

I have a serious case of the Mondays (holiday Mondays are WAY worse than every other Monday that isn't in December) I really thought I wouldn't hate Christmas this year, but oh yes I do. I find it stressful and overwhelming... I have had a migraine for 4 days. So I hate myself for this, but I am not going for a run. I am not going because my head hurts, I have tons of work to do and I have Doctors appointment this afternoon... so I don't want to be all sweaty. I also have an insanely long day because of above doctors appointment and probably won't get dinner (I have sent Richard to a friends house... I sound like a Mom... not his Mom, just a Mom. For reference visit my wedding blog listed below) I just want to go home and go to sleep... the perk to stress, frustration and anger is no appetite. So I am not too worried.

As for the stress, which scares me, its wedding planning, an overbearing Mother-in-law, Christmas, Dad and work... the reason it scares me is because I never used to be this stressed about my world, but suddenly I am not allowed to make any of my own decisions and I start having a panic attack. I hate having to consult someone for everything I do, all day every day. Even scarier, if I am this stressed out now... what about when I do have kids?!??! I don't want to be one of those HIGH strung out mothers.

It all relates to fitness because I can't work out when I am stressed and I want to avoid everyone and everything so I tend to hide out in bed and get fat... yes, that is still possible while starving; at least in my world.

I also recently learned almost everything that ails me is stress related... when will it end? After the wedding? I wish... I doubt it, I will always have the mother in law issues. Argh (no 'hmpf' today while the groom and I are bickering.)

As for the doctors appointment... its to get an ultrasound of my thyroid, things aren't working right and its time to fix them, although the timing is crap.

Sorry there was no advent doodle yesterday... I can't be creative when I am angry (more so than today).

Love!

Oops!

I am not sick... actually let's re-phrase with 'I am not sick enough to write a one sentence post about being sick' thats more accurate.

I was linking previous posts and clicked the wrong button without realizing until later... Oops. Sorry if I caused concern and I will promptly return the chicken noodle soup delivered lovingly to my door... Kidding! I am not returning anything.

As for today... its a whole new day. I am having a terrible, no good, very bad day. I woke up 4 times through the night; the first was because Richard fell asleep with the TV on... on wrestling. The Big guy was in the middle of yelling at the bigger guy and it all seeped into my dreams. I woke up angry and confused, slapped Richard (unintentionally) and made him turn the TV off. All of this was even more awkward, because of how sore every fiber of my being was/is. Why am I so sore you ask. I decided to run. Outside. In November. In Canada. I have this running schedule that hangs over my head and in sharing it with Richard he lays a mighty fine guilt trip when I make excuses. Its good and motivating, but sad and depressing when I am running in the dark to meet my goal. I did a 45minute run and ran just over 6k... go me! I came home with a runny nose and every part of my body ached... see my previous post in regards to the stairs that I faced to get out of the rain and into my warm house.

Wait... where was I? Right, today sucks. So not only am I tired, from being woken up (a second time involved a vivid dream about my teenage children) but while styling my mane (see picture) I through my neck out... at least that is what I think I did, because I have never done it before I can't be sure. As of right now I can't turn my head or accurately navigate my left arm without pain. On top of all that it is raining and oh yea, I fell down the stairs. Hmpf. Its really the only word to correctly grasp this kind of day. Hmpf.

Ironic though... all these things go wrong on the day I have a doctors' appointment... my first in 13 months. He's going to cringe as I shake out my laundry list of ailments for him to work out. The most important will be my Hypo symptoms... followed quickly by my neck pain. I think that testing will involve blood work too... so my very bad day will be complete with a needle. Hmpf.

I hope you enjoyed my pain... it almost makes it all worth it.

Love?

Coconut? Or Bowling Ball?

I have heard this before... the magic of the coconut, but I don't know what to believe. I first heard about the true powers of coconut as an energy drink, perfect post work out. I also learned it has the genetic build up to do blood transfusions IF blood is not available. It happen in the war... or something (not that I am shooluffing off the incredible-ness of that feat, I just don't need it :)

I thought about drinking coconut water after a good sweat, but couldn't get past the texture and didn't find enough articles to back it up PLUS it is hard to find and I am ALWAYS on a budget.

Now the sneaky little coconut has popped up again... this time as a 'cure' for hypothyroidism... the BAIN of my existence. This theory says that the natural build up of coconut oil can aid in treating hypothyroidism and help you loose weight by simply working it into your diet. Sounds good right? Is it true? Am I getting sucked in my another fad? I am such a sucker for a good weight loss scam.

I just want to be skinny so badly and nothing works... not even the traditional diet and exercise. Hmmm...

Now before everyone gets excited... I am not going to shell out the money for MORE pills, but I am going to a naturopath. I am going to ask them hundreds of questions... I want to be healthy, but I don't know how to get there.

Check out the article...

http://thyroid.about.com/cs/dietweightloss/a/coconutoil.htm

What do you think? Am I getting scammed again???

Off to spin...