Whewf! I made it... at the very least Richard survived the entire ordeal.
I have a final appointment tonight to see just what it all means and I hope, for my doctors sake, I am not allergic to gluten. I miss bread SO much!
As for the Richard reference... I am lucky to have someone SO understanding.
Day FOUR... started like any other day, but after 4 hours of traffic and a never depleting inbox I was ready to explode on any creature that dared to cross my path. I came home looking for a fight... This is where I have to admit, Richard and I don't fight, but tonight I would make it happen.
He sat casually on the bed... simply playing Call of Duty. At first I said nothing, daring him to ask about my day, but he didn't. He was engulfed in his game, which made things worse. Why wasn't he paying attention to me? I barked at him about ignoring me. Than I barked about his response and when he wouldn't respond I yelled at him for not communicating with me. He sat and smiled as I ranted about everything in my life. I went on to explain I hated my life. I hated every detail of our life and honesty I was ready to walk in front of a bus. I am screaming at this point and still he says nothing. Finally, I told him he didn't love me and stormed out.
After he had fallen asleep I climbed into bed. Our first night without a goodnight kiss and cuddle. I still had steam coming out of my ears over his lack of enthusiasm during our fight.
Day FIVE... after the post was even worse. I wanted a cookie so badly I scoured the Internet for something I could make at home. It couldn't contain wheat, diary or sugar. A daring feat, but after hours of crying at my computer begging for a break I found a vegan recipe that just might work. I had also cried to my follow detoxer Cheryl about being SO HUNGRY. She suggested Rice noodles and Pesto. I hate pasta, but I was desperate. I sent a text to Richard trying to exude excitement about my cookie recipe. His replied described how he was enjoying an Oreo. I was still sucking up after Day FOUR and didn't reply the way I wanted to... instead I cried. I stopped at the grocery store on the way home and spent $50 on specialty crap I needed to make these vegan cookies and this detox friendly dinner. They didn't have regular rice noodle so I got vermicelli noodles. They didn't have any fresh chicken so I go frozen chicken breast... and so on.
I came home ready to try out my new recipes... full of excitement over my new found treasures.
My cookies came out resembling cow pattys... only grosser.
My noodles had balled together, because you don't cook rice noodles the same as REAL noodles. My frozen chicken breast resembled a sponge when it was cooked and after dousing it all in pesto I realized this particular brand of pesto was made with cheese... I can't EAT cheese.
I threw out my cookies after demanding my mother in law taste them and calling her liar when she said they weren't THAT bad.
I marched upstairs to an awaiting Richard with my green ball of goo and sponge chicken. I didn't even make it into the room before I started weeping... uncontrollably. I couldn't be consoled. I couldn't catch my breath. I tried to explain the horror of my day, but Richard couldn't understand me and honestly he didn't hide his laughter all that well. I was a mess. He finally let me sit on his lap and there I sat crying for the next couple hours, before I finally fell asleep with an empty stomach.
This is why I hate detox... this is also why Richard is questioning going through pregnancy with me... poor guy didn't even see it coming.
I am almost done... it all comes to a close tonight and even though I know its going to make me sick... I am eating Oreo ice cream when I get home.
Wish me luck!