Friday, May 7, 2010


Ok it's happen. I hit that low... not on the scale, but emotionally. I am frustrated and sick of working SO hard and not getting anywhere. I am suffering from POOR ME.I really thought I was making progress, but this past weekend has snookered me. I thought I was visibly smaller and proud to celebrate my weight loss... I met up with family I hadn't seen since Christmas... I expected a comment or something, than I saw the pictures and holy hell I look like a heffer! They are all candiate shots... I didn't have time to pose of suck it in... wow. Quite the eye opener... now normally it would just motivate me, remind me of how unhappy I am at this weight, but today it just frustrated me.

Above is the irrational, emotional... that time of the month, I'm bloated side of me talking.

Rational Melanie is keeping quiet inside my pretty little head, she knows better than to spout of facts about my reccent conditions... I am retaining water and didn't make it to the gym for ALL my work-outs. I have been snacking and indulging in chocolate and not sleeping. I have been stressed at work and at home. AND I am pretty sure I have a broken toe... how the hell could I expect a further loss???

But I don't want to listen to her... I want to pout and stamp my feet. I want to quit and crawl back into bed. I want to sleep until I can't sleep anymore. The early shift is depriving me of my favorite things... mainly naps, sleeping in and sleep.

I am going to the gym today... come hell or high water, but I am not craving it like I use too. Last night we went for a walk... I was feeling guilty about missing the gym and needed exercise, but with the toe I didn't want to run. We walked for nearly an hour... it was nice to get out in the fresh air and walk with Richard... it was like a little date. We started on my running trail and ended up strolling through the woods. It was good.

Ok... I am just bringing myself down. I vow on my life and my relationship to get back on track next week.

Monday - 8k
Tuesday - SPIN
Wednesday - HOT YOGA
Thursaday - TBD
Friday - 8k

Now... its up to ALL my readers to hold me accountable. Give me shit if I fall off or make excuses... I need your help to keep focused. I don't want to give up this time. I have almost 25pounds to go and I need to do it this time.


PS  - on the UPSIDE pictures are back :)

PPS - I made a graph... to make me feel better...


  1. Good Mornings- Although they are a rarely performed weight training exercise by a large majority of bodybuilders, good mornings remain one of the staples of a good size and strength gaining program. Powerlifters seem to be the only ones who know about the muscle building properties of this outstanding exercise. The reason this muscle building exercise is often avoided is that good mornings are brutally hard work. But that hard work brings huge rewards. Good mornings will build muscle fast and pack tons of size on your lower back, glutes, and hamstrings. They are also one of the best weight training exercises to help improve your squat and deadlift, which is the main reason they are a mainstay in powerlifting.

  2. I am intrigued... what is a 'good morning' ??